Conversations With My Kids: Liam Says I Am Fat

Liam: Wow! You have actually gotten fatter, Dad.
Me <looks in mirror>: What do you mean?
Liam: Since the last time I saw you. Your fat used to hang here <gestures below his tummy> but now it is hanging here <gestures near his knees>
Me: What? When was the last time you "saw me"? <feeling like crap>
Liam: Yesterday. Before you ate split pea soup and starting farting all the time.

Changes and the Things to Come.

It's been a while since I have posted I. My blog but there is a decent reason why. This past June I moved with my from Michigan to New Jersey. As a result, I have been to busy getting things sorted and getting into a whole new routine that seems to change on me everyday. As a result I have been depressed and somedays unable to cope with the changes. I miss my family; my daughter,my mom, my dad, my sister, my little nephew John, my friend Ian and many more people that I may have taken for granted when I was living in Michigan. After all most people that stay in one place for their entire life become content with the people and places around them. Sure I have a clean slate here in New Jersey but it's difficult to come to terms with the differences in my daily life. I struggle everyday getting used to handling 3 kids as opposed to the day being just me and my 3 year old. I have been lucky to spend a little time with the great guys if the NYC Dads group but they are just a little too far away for me to go into NYC every other day.

As some of my regular reader, if there are any, may know that last year I won a scholarship to the 18th Annual At-Home Dads Convention and had an amazing time. After the convention I started dedicating my free time to help with the National At-Home Dad Network, I have written for their blog, helped with the fundraising committee and helped with the scholarship committee. I had a main goal of helping make the scholarship grow more than it has ever done. Without having away any information since the network hasn't announced the winners or anything I can say that I have succeeded in this goal. Unfortunately, there is one goal I have not been able to fulfill, saving my own money to attend the 19th Annual At-Home Dad Convention this year. I began by spending cash and saving all my ones and change. I would not spend those. Over time I started to add 5s here or there and my saving started to grow big time. In a few months I had saved over 150 dollars. But then the move came and I was forced to use those savings. I have not been able to recover since. With the convention getting closer and closer and looking at our future finances it is obvious that I won't be able to go unless I can somehow raise the money. At the behest of my good friend, whom is going but wants me there too, I created a GoFundMe campaign to help raise the money needed to attend the convention. 

This convention is really special to me in so many ways. The guys that run it are all people I hold dear as close friends. When I am down they are there to help me. When I need advice they have all been there or are going through the same thing. The convention offers so much for any dad, whether it be an at home dad or a working dad, there are some great things to help you learn to be an even better dad. I came away from the convention last year feeling refreshed and feeling like I can handle it all. Now I need that refresher. I need that reminder that there are other guys just like me that all have some story that is different yet still the same. 

I have been lucky to raise over $100 so far but that just isn't enough to get me there. If you can donate anything, even a dollar please do it! If you are afraid someone may see your donation then you can donate anonymously and not have to worry about that. All I ask is that you consider something.

Apraxia Awareness

So today is Apraxia awareness day. A lot of you may not know but my daughter Gabi has apraxia. When she reached the age of 3 and 4 when she should be talking she wasn't saying much at all. Mostly she just made noises and tried to indicate what she wanted. Many people would mistake her for being autistic or mentally challenged in some form but I knew she understood everything. When school started, the teachers suggested so each therapy so we had an IEP set up and she has been doing that ever since. There didn't seem to be much progress for a few years so we took her to an ENT specialist who suggest tubes in her ears. After the surgery we noticed big changes. We thought this would cure all the issues; at this point we didn't know about the apraxia. She stay in speech therapy and kept improving but she seemed to hit a wall and was making slow progress. It was then, about 2 years ago when she was 10 that I found  out about apraxia. Had I know about apraxia earlier we would have  been able to give her more attention. That being said lately she was grown so much in her vocabulary. She has good grades and has proved she is smart kid and is capable in spite of this one drawback. I am really proud of her progress, even when he says a phrase that makes absolutely no sense I know she is still trying. I want to the thank the teachers and staff at Webber Elementary in Lake Orion, MI for doing a great job in helping Gabi progress and always pushing her succeed.

If you know some one who has Apraxia please share your story today and help people understand that just because they can't say it doesn't mean they don't know it.

Mother's Day: A Day For Moms...Not Dads.

It's that time a year again. Everyone begins to get all teary eyed and wish a happy mother's day to their stay at home dad. Wait, what? Yes this does happen. I know not that much but last year, I saw a number of people wishing happy Mother's Day to their male friends that take on the role as an at home parent. I have seen friends of mine post pictures of themselves holding cards and lovely flowers, saying they received a Mother's Day card. I try not to get upset about things like this but in this instance it really bothers me. Not because it offends me or puts me in an emasculated position (which it does) but because this is supposed to be a day for moms. Not dads. Working moms, at home moms, retired moms, moms you have lost, moms you may gain, moms to be and moms who have lost are all the people that should be honored on this day. Moms...Not dads.

Don't get me wrong here, what we, at home dads, do is pretty amazing. We cook, we clean, do laundry, take kids to school and the park; things that have always been associated with "motherhood." We handle every aspect of the house while our amazing wives do what needs to be done to ensure there is food in our mouths and clothes on our backs. But I ask this one simple question, Since when does Mother's Day mean Homemakers Day?

Exactly...It doesn't

To me, it seems that by giving an at home dad a Mother's Day gift you are just slapping both, moms and dads, in the face. You are saying, "Dads, you are not man enough and working moms you are not womanly enough because you don't stay at home." And that is just wrong. Moms deserve Mother's Day. It is their day to relax and forget about their problems while the kids serve them. It is a day to honor our mothers and just our mothers. At home dads have their own day, would you give a working mom a Father's Day card because she is doing a mans job?

I didn't think so.

Please don't wish a dad a happy Mother's Day. It really isn't necessary because we dads know we are doing more than dads have historically done; but what we also know is that we have amazing wives and they deserve Mother's Day...Not us.

Thoughts on Organization.

One thing I have always struggled with as an At Home Dad is the organizational stuff. Keeping a well packed diaper bag, ensuring laundry is neat & put away and making sure the kids keep their toys cleaned up have always been issues that I just can't seem to get right. There have been many time where I went a few weeks and had it all under control but then I fall back a little and seem to go right back to not caring much. Right now the laundry is mostly clean but none of it is is put away or even folded for that matter and I have been caught in public without a fresh pair of pants for my potty training 3 year old one to many times so I have decided it is time to make some changes and hope they stick.

One problem that causes me to fall behind is the stuff I volunteer with causes me to feel overwhelmed and I just shut down instead. After looking at all  I do I realized I am a pretty busy guy even though I am behind on all my endeavors I still have a lot of none house thing that keep me from being productive. I am going to start dedicating each day to one thing. On Monday I will work on this blog, Tuesday I will work on my book, Wednesday I will do something for the NAHDN blog, Thursday I will work on stuff for the convention and on Friday I will do work for the gaming site IndieLove. Saturday and Sunday will be spend with the kids and after they go to bed I will either game, watch a movie or work on the book. Now before I do any of this I will be sure that the house work is done first or I don't do it. I am really hopeful this new system will work out and I will start getting things done instead of just getting by with the minimum and never actually complete a project.

How about you? Do you struggle with this kind of stuff? Do you have a system that works for you? Let me know in the comments.

Guest Post: Ed Elkins: "I am the Walking Dad".

I would like to congratulate my old high school friend Ed Elkins on the birth of his new baby and thank him for writing this great piece for me. I hope you all enjoy. This was was written the day after his first night home with his little boy.

The cry through the baby monitor could only mean one thing at 4:30 in the morning- "Feed Me Seymour!" Or maybe it was the lack of sleep that was making me hallucinate that Connor was crying. Nope...he was definitely crying.

It is amazing how calm everything is when your baby is cared for by trained nurses and covered in electrodes, heated by a baby broiler and fed on the hour every 3 hours by nurses with decades of experience with preemies like Connor. Then he is released out of the cocoon called the NICU and paranoia sets in. Not the kind of paranoia you get when you notice you're driving 10 miles over the speed limit and see a highway trooper parked on the side of the freeway...no that is paranoia of the conscience showcasing your sanity alongside all of the other break-lights that light up US 60 on a regular basis. This is a different beast entirely. 

It is the paranoia of the *Walking Dad*. You hear a noise, any type of noise really, and your sleepless body enters a state of suspended animation and you awaken to realize you are staring down at this little 4lb baby boy checking to make sure he is breathing. Are you looking close enough? You saw a movement but maybe it was a breeze from the window that you know deep down isn't even open. You start pondering where your wife keeps her makeup compact because you could always hold the mirror portion of it under his nose to confirm and look for condensation. 

You pick him up out of his crib ever so gently and suddenly remember that "project" in middle school where they made you take the egg home to simulate caring for a baby and how you dropped yours when getting off the bus after school that day. So you want to hold him as tightly as possible but then you remember the passage in "Of Mice and Men" where Lennie learns of his own strength while petting a puppy so you decide to carry him like you are an accomplished cat burglar stealing the crown jewels or at least how you imagine a cat burglar would carry something so precious.

The next thing you know he has a clean diaper and you are telling him stories about your childhood and answering his imaginary questions like only a sleep deprived parent can do. Still, he makes for a good conversation so you ramble on because, let's face it, he's not going to tell you to stop. If anything he'll yawn from boredom and you'll yawn back because you're running on two hours of sleep. Then you get to feed him and worry that every noise he makes while drinking from the bottle is some type of sign that he's choking or having problems. In reality he is just being adorable but the only sane thing awake right now is the dog and she'll only tell you if she has to poop or wants to play so you're pretty much left to your own demons at this point. 

His diaper is changed, he's been fed (and probably already dirtying the new diaper) when you realize it is time that you try to fall back to sleep..at least until you hear a grunt or a coo through the baby monitor and freak out again. When you wake up two hours later to feed him and change him again you look in the mirror at the monster staring back at you. Eyes red and barely opening surrounded by dark sunken circles. You are leaking fluids from your nose thanks to allergies and you walk ever so slowly out of the bedroom dragging your feet every step of the way groaning thanks to the sinus headache and realization that you really have to pee but don't have the energy to walk back to the bathroom. You've become a zombie..a paranoid zombie..a member of the *Walking Dad*. 

Hollywood has it all wrong. You don't have to be bitten by a zombie to become one- I was attacked by adorable, killed by cuteness and am brought back to life every time those big eyes stare up at me. 

I am the Walking Dad.

Former lawyer turned sane citizen, voice actor and fledgling dad Ed Elkins has been quickly humbled by the birth of his first child, Connor. Born at only 33 weeks and just less than 4 pounds, Connor spent only two weeks in the NICU before being released. For more information about Ed you can visit his website at edelkins.com.

Disney on Ice: Let's Celebrate Review

Sometimes there is nothing more exciting then watching a 3 year old get excited about his favorite characters. When the show starts and Mickey bursts out onto the ice, his face lights up, his mouth opens wide and an uncontrolled squeal escapes his mouth. I could believe how happy that made me. Almost to tears, I clap along and act like a child myself in the hopes I will make his enjoyment better.

The night started rough because it was just me and my four kids. Recently, my wife has moved to New Jersey with the hopes of finding a better job while we stay behind to finish the school year. This has, of course, put a lot of stress on all of us. This was a chance for us to leave the house and forget, just for a moment, that mom wasn't around. 

We had pretty good seats so I was happy that I wouldn't have to worry about the kids not being able to see. When the lights went out you could hear their excitement. All four of them were screaming with wonder and as soon as the light came on and the show began you could see the shear happiness on their faces. They weren't weren't concerned with whether ice skating was lame or for girls they were in love with the show no matter what. 

A few highlights from the show were the surprises. The Halloween bit was fun and a good introduction to The Nightmare Before Christmas for my kids. My favorite was the Lilo & Stitch beach scene. Really fun and the kids loved seeing stitch playing around. We all loved the fire dancing they did and it just completely blew us away.  I think the kids favorite part was when the characters from Toy Story came out. There was so much going on and I could go on all day about how cool it was but I don't have the time.

If you want to catch the show at the Palace of Auburn Hills in Michigan you have until Sunday after that they will be headed to

As a special promotion to my readers Disney on Ice is offering a discount on tickets.

Used the Code: 18MOM to get tickets for only $18!!

Just use this link to make your purchase and to see if you have any shows near you!

http://www.ticketmaster.com/venueartist/65562/1349262

Disclaimer: Valid on the $26 and $20 price levels only.  Not valid with any other offer or discount.  Must purchase via ticketmaster.com.  Limit of 8 tickets per order.  

Please thank them and let them know Geek Daddio sent you:

Facebook: Disney On Ice

Twitter: @DisneyOnIce

Here are some photos of our visit:

Disclosure: FELD Entertainment provided my family with tickets in exchange for this post.